Here without you
by Kenelfie
Summary: Just a little something for the Pegsy fans. A postCecelia fic based on the song Here without you by Three Doors Down. Oneshot


A/n: This may be a bit weird. The inspiration hit me when I got 'Here Without You' by Three Doors Down stuck in my head while in the shower. ;

Pairing: Maximillion Pegasus/Cecelia Pegasus

Disclaimer: I own them if Cecelia physically comes back and Maxi gets a major part and the majority of YuGiOh fangirls fall in love with him (even though that SHOULD happen……)

Note: The lyrics have been removed with fair observation by I didn't write them so I shouldn't be allowed to post them. The lyrics are on www. letssingit .com for anyone who's interested.

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I looked at the picture of my late wife. There's one in every room I visit regularly. I feel so old and incomplete without her by my side.

I have told so many lies. I've lied to Seto Kaiba, KaibaCorp.'s Big Five, Mokuba Kaiba, Yugi Motou and his group, Croquet, but most of all to myself. I have tried to convince myself that my decisions were alright because they were for the right reasons. But I had to be honest with myself. They weren't for the right reasons. My actions weren't completely for Cecelia. My actions were made out of love, loneliness, insanity and greed. I am selfish person when it comes to her, and I'm the first to admit it. Would she ever had done anything like this to bring me back if I were the one to die instead, or would she prove stronger and accept my death?

I sighed as I laid my head down on my soft pillow. If one were being exact, it would be her pillow, but I've had slept with it ever since she had passed away. Her sweet scent still clings to it, which is a comfort to me. As my eye closed, I entered the world of dreams, where any wish can come true. She was there waiting, as usual. Only in this time have I even been content after her death.

Every morning is the same. I'll be holding her until my alarm goes off, startling her out of my arms. Every day my thoughts were about one subject. Her. She is my love, my obsession, my life. I can barely stand the thought of living without the thought of her to remind me of how she cherished life and how I should to, even if she isn't here with me.

During any spare moments I can get, I dream about what might have been with them. Now, she was gone and I am still living on Earth without her pretty face. Someday I would join her, but now was not my time. The only way we are currently united is in my dreams. During the night, I am the happiest man ever. It's all about us in my dreams. Us and only us. No boring business meetings to attend, no stupid tournaments to run, and no lies to tell. Everything is perfect in my dreams, as I'm sure they were in Cecelia's as well. Neither of us dreamed that we'd be separated so shortly after our marriage I'm sure.

Since Cecelia's death, other women have approached me. They go out of their way to try and flatter me, but I have eyes for none but her. She's what inspires me in everything I do. My actions are for her. I keep wishing I could turn back the clock, but that's impossible. Time goes only one way for almost all; myself included. My sweet, darling Cecelia will just have to be patient until my journey on life's road is over and my trip is complete. Then I will rejoin her.

No words could describe how life was before Cecelia passed away. Now, saying life is crap is an understatement. The wounds on my heart will never heal, but I hope that it gets better as I go. I couldn't take it if it were different. One of my motivations for everytime I think of ending my life, is that everyday I get through, is another obstacle completed in my course to my love. I can't just take the easy way out. If I truly love Cecelia, I will do what she would want. I will continue to live.

All my days have seemed like nights since Cecelia died. If my depression continues much longer, I'm going to seek professional help. Cecelia was always the optimist. She was always there to lift me up when I was having a rough day. Just seeing her smile, even if it weren't for me, never failed to make my day.

I often dream about us with a child. Sometime a boy, sometimes a girl. The child usually takes after his/her mother more than me since she is so much more beautiful than I am. Cecelia is always smiling at our children and me when those dreams occur. At other times, when there are no children, I am the solo recipient of her attention. I don't know which dream I like the most.

No matter how much time may pass, and how hopeless finding her may seem, I will never give up. I will still love her. She is my first and last love.

No matter what may come, Cecelia will always be first in my mind. I love her so much it hurts. No one could make me stop loving her for anything.

I wonder if it's a physical health hazard to dream this much. My uncle would not of approved of it, but of course, he never fell in love himself so he would be a bad person to ask about anything on the matter. I learned that the hard way. Fortunately Cecelia has, I mean, had a great sense of humor and laughed when I used his advice on how to ask her out. I asked her mother for advice on how to propose to her so my crazy single uncle couldn't mess anything up by advising me wrongly.

Now, it is late and I go to the one place I am happy. My dreams, where my lady awaits me.


End file.
